Take Christmas, for example. When I was a kid, I knew Christmas was the best day of the year, without fail. But as the years have ticked by, and I find myself having to do proper, adult things like buying presents for everyone (especially on a student budget... namely NOTHING) I can definitely see why alcohol is everywhere- in the chocolates, on puddings, eggnog etc.
BECAUSE WITHOUT IT WE'D GO INSANE!
Think about it- everything in the holiday period would make our heads explode in any other months...
Listening to the same, 30 year old Christmas songs on repeat since November?
Having people knock on your door expecting money for 4 lines of We Wish You A Merry Christmas?
Paying ten times as much for everything? And then not even knowing if the person will even like their gift!
PASS ME THE GODDAMN EGGNOG
Now I am willing to bet that each and every one of you has had a bad experience with monopoly, because, let's face it, who hasn't?
Whether it was the start of a lifelong family feud, or hitting rock bottom by stealing money from the bank, it's ok. We've all been there.
So earlier this year, I took the initiative and created Drunk Monopoly
I'm probably not the first person to have ever done it, but it's still pretty awesome.
And the funny thing is, the first time I played drunk monopoly, I was almost bankrupt right away. However, as I got more tipsy, and my housemates stayed sober, I got better and better and better, and they even had to form an alliance to try to survive!!!
I wiped the floor with them, and as my win was so glorious, I half believed the alcohol had magic properties...
So here are the rules my friends, so that you too can be victorious!
- Every time you pass Go, take a shot
- If you land on Go, as well as taking £400, you need to take 2 shots
- If you're in jail, make a dirty mans pint and finish it by the end of your sentence
- Because no-one likes the asshole that lands on free parking, make them wear something ridiculous as a token of revenge, until the next person lands on free parking.
- If you come second place in a beauty contest, drown your sorrows and just generally give up on life.
- As I own the Lord of the Rings version of monopoly, whoever is last to say 'we're taking the hobbits to Isenguard' when you land on Isenguard takes a shot.
This is a great game to play if you're getting ready to go out and have about 2 hours, or for a fun night in. Surprisingly, this game gets requested a lot in my student house after a night out at the pub, and games usually last until 1am, or whenever more than half of the participants are having difficulty keeping their eyes open.
Have fun with this!